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What Not to Say When Your Child Is Bullied (Most Parents Mean Well)
by Christian Victory
💡 TLDW (Too Long; Didn't Watch)
Teaches 3 phrases to avoid when your child is bullied and what to say instead
by Christian Victory
Teaches 3 phrases to avoid when your child is bullied and what to say instead
Learn three common phrases parents say when their child is bullied that can actually make things worse, and discover what to say instead to build confidence and resilience.
Don't tell your child to ignore the bullying. This tells them their pain isn't worth addressing and trains avoidance rather than confidence.
Some bullying doesn't stop when ignored. Your child needs to know their feelings matter and that you'll help them address the situation.
Don't blame your child for not defending themselves. This adds shame on top of their fear and makes them feel weak or like they've disappointed you.
Standing up for yourself is a skill that must be learned. Your child may not have developed these skills yet, and shaming them won't help.
Don't tell your child to toughen up. This confuses toughness with emotional shutdown and teaches them to hide instead of grow.
This approach breaks trust instead of building resilience. Your child needs to learn healthy ways to handle difficult emotions, not suppress them.
Replace dismissive responses with supportive partnership. Let your child know you're on their team and will work through this together.
This approach validates their feelings and provides the support they need to navigate the bullying situation.
Explain that standing up for yourself is a skill that can be learned, not something they should already know how to do.
Frame self-advocacy as a skill to develop together, not a failure on their part for not having it yet.
Tell your child 'You're not wrong for feeling this. Now, let's build some strength.'
Strength isn't pretending it doesn't hurt. Strength is learning how to handle hard moments with confidence. This approach builds trust and resilience.